Birkas Kohanim is the blessing Jewish men who are descendants of the high priest perform together during the high holidays. This can apply to all of the holidays and there is nothing different on Passover.
Thee men and their sons in the synagogue would line up on the side of the “alter” and wait until it was time to say the prayer. They would take their shoes off before they went in front of everyone. Before the prayer starts, you see all of the men with their children under a tallis (prayer shawl) and looking down at the floor. I remember being a curious kid, but also a fearful one. We were told to not look at the men up front reciting the prayer, as they were doing a holy act that can’t be seen by anyone except yahweh.
Well, there were times where I just couldn’t help it. I took a peak for a few seconds. After I did, I felt guilty and wished I didn’t. It made me feel that I saw something graphic. On top of that, I also felt that I disobeyed yahweh and would be punished in the world to come.
I look back at these moments and feel grateful I’m not living that way anymore. I don’t hold any grudges to those who brainwashed me with the belief system, but I do have a disgust with the belief it self. It’s sickening, encourages fear, humility, and shame, and discourages skepticism, reason, and curiosity.
I admit I have some great memories about Passover. The time I spent with family, the days off of school, getting to stay up past my bed time, and other warm childish memories. But none of them had to do with what the holiday is really about. That’s why I no longer celebrate it.